How to decline an offer after I have accepted it?

Submitted by Anonymous (not verified)
in
Career Management

Hi all,

 

I have accepted (and signed) an offer from company A (I should start working in 2 months).

After 2 weeks I got a proposal from company B. Proposal B is much better for my career-path and for my future employability.

How would you tell company A that you have changed your mind and will not start working there? 

 

p.s. I know that this act is not "ok", but my career and future opportunities are far more important. It would be not ok to my family to take offerA, and my family comes first!

Thanks!

Submitted by Yura Kosh on Tuesday June 6th, 2017 9:51 am

In reply to by DJ_150

Thanks for your reply. Well, it would be highly inefficient to proceed with company A. Lets say company A = developer at a startup company B = Google CEO. I doubt that anyone would go for A. So just wondering form personal point of view - how would you guys personally do it? Thanks! :)

Submitted by Yura Kosh on Sunday June 11th, 2017 6:19 am

If I take A - it will be extremely wrong for my family and with all the difficulty in that, my family comes first. So I got to take B....

Submitted by Kevin Picton on Monday June 12th, 2017 10:21 pm

Hi The Hiker, 
Of course you can take the new offer if it is better for you.   Be aware though, that there are consequences of doing so.   You are likely to be blacklisted at Company A.  You are also likely to be blacklisted by the people who interviewed you and several others involved in making you the offer that you accepted.  These people won't always work at Company A, so you may face a blacklisting at Company C, D & E in the future.
They may also transition themselves to a role at Company B where, if they outrank you, they can make your career difficult at Company B.
If you still wish to go with the Company B offer, knowing that these are the longer term consequences, then go for it.   There isn't going to be a 'nice way' to tell Company A.  Sooner the better so they can start the hiring process again as quickly as possible.
Best regards
Kev 

Submitted by Yura Kosh on Monday June 12th, 2017 11:53 pm

Thank you Kev. Yeah, I am aware of the consequences, which might be tough and I am willing to take them. My question is very technical - how would you tell it to company A? I have the manager's phone# and email and can contact him directly. (As a matter of fact, he worked with my cousin and knows him well, so it will even be more difficult...).
I am asking solely about the tactical way to say things and how to present them.
 
Thank you!

Submitted by Yura Kosh on Monday June 12th, 2017 11:58 pm

I mean should I say directly the reason? Should I name company B or should I keep the name discrete?  Should I say that I am taking another offer or just say that some personal issues have changed and I can not start working at company A? Should I make it by phone or come physically to company A's offices? Maybe say that I have interviewed with company A several months ago and the position was frozen, I did not even think about them and now they got back to me and this is something that I can not "not take"....
...?

Submitted by Mike Bruns on Tuesday June 13th, 2017 7:47 am

Sorry, I don't think you're understanding.  You are asking the equivalent of:
"I've decided to cheat on my spouse. Should I conceal it or what's the best way to tell them?"
It doesn't matter if you talk about your connection with the new person, your dissatisfaction with your current situation, physical problems, mental problems, travel, etc.
Declining an offer after accepting isn't illegal. It happens all the time. It doesn't make it right or recommended.
If you're going to decline, do it now so that company A can move onto another candidate.