Hello,
I am having a conversation with my direct. Could be during a one-on-one or a regular talk about their project. Do I ask for permission to give feedback during that conversation?
I obviously have their attention, they are in cooperative mood (if they weren't we wouldn't have the conversation).
When I do ask "may I give you some feedback?", they raise their eyebrows, say "Yes, of course", probably thinking "Isn't it obvious I'm listening to you?"
The reason I want to give feedback in the middle of the conversation is this. It could be about their behavior during performance of a task we are discussing. It could be feedback about their actions they just described. And one of the reasons is that I already have their attention.
Typically I have those conversations in my office behind the closed doors, or in places where other people can't hear us.
With that, do I use the first step in this situation? And if yes, any suggestions on wording?
Thanks.
-Eugene
Yes, you still must ask. The
Yes, you still must ask.
The reason for the question is to make sure the person is open to receiving feedback (affirming or corrective) at that moment. They might be perfectly willing to talk to you about other topics but be having a terrible day otherwise. Maybe they just can't handle feedback at that moment. Maybe they are having a great day and would rather get affirming feedback when they are having a worse day. Maybe they were just about to say "I need to go". For whatever reason, it's still good to ask.
Another concern is breaking the habit. Once you stop asking in some situations, it might leak into other situations as well, either with that person or with others.
Tom, thanks a lot for the
Tom, thanks a lot for the answer.
In my situations, in 90-95% of the cases the person is open to receiving feedback. With that, how would you word the question so that it does not sound rhetorical?